My parents don’t have an estate plan! How can I convince them to start?
My Parents Don’t have an Estate Plan! How can I convince them to start?
Posted on 05:59h
Wills
by Phelps LaClair Law
You know how important having an estate plan in place, a will and end-of life documents is. This does not mean that your parents will be on the same page.
Let’s start with a fictional scenario that will cover all the important points.
Scenario: The Peterson Family
Question: What happens if my parents don’t write a will?
Imagine the Petersons, who are in their 80s and have lived in their charming home in Arizona for decades. They want to give their home to the youth minister at their church because their only child Alex lives in another state. Alex has no interest in buying a home in Arizona. They have always been clear in their wishes but have not taken any steps to make it possible.
They’ve
put it off for years, thinking that they would eventually get to creating a will
. They distrust lawyers and prefer to do the paperwork themselves (which is a bad idea, as you know). They prefer to enjoy their retirement and not deal with legal issues. Alex Peterson, the son of the Petersons, has tried many times to convince his parents to begin estate planning. Alex reminds his parents that unless they specify otherwise in the legal documents, their home will automatically be transferred to him. If the Petersons pass away without ever starting their estate plan, Alex will have to face all sorts of problems.Intestacy Laws: Since the Petersons didn’t create a will, their estate will be divided according to Arizona’s intestacy laws. Since Alex is their only child, he would legally inherit the home and all their other assets, despite the Petersons’ wishes.
Potential Family or Legal Conflicts
-
- : Even though Alex agrees with their decision and doesn’t want the home, he might face legal challenges from other parties who may have had an informal understanding with the Petersons. The lack of a written will can lead to disputes, legal battles, and emotional stress.Delays and Unnecessary Costs: The estate will need to go through probate, a time-consuming and expensive legal process. This could significantly reduce the value of their home and the other assets that the Petersons might leave behind.How Do I Get My Parents to Write a Will?
- Approaching unwilling parents about putting together their end-of-life documents must be done in the right manner. We know that it can be a stressful topic to bring up. Here are four tips that will help you convince your parents to move forward. Validate their point of views and understand them. Estate planing is a very heavy topic and can cause a lot of discomfort. Acknowledge the hesitancy or mistrust of your clients and assure them that they are respected. Let them know that you are prepared to address their concerns and will not cloud the situation with personal desires. Select the right time. You should never bring up this subject at a family gathering, a backyard barbecue, or any other event. The location should be quiet and comfortable, and the date and time should be set in advance. The kitchen table is often the best place for these discussions. Big decisions are often discussed around the table, so the setting will feel comfortable.
- 3. Empathy and understanding are the best ways to express concern. Frame your conversation around your feelings rather than their shortcomings. You might say, “I know that you’ve been enjoying your retirement and that writing a will is something you can do later. I am worried about what would happen if both of you suddenly disappeared. I’m also worried about what might happen if one of you died. I know you both have specific wishes, and I want to honor them. I want to make this process as easy as possible for both of you.”
4. Use real-life situations that they can relate to. Use
real-life examples to help make the point. Remind them gently that creating an estate plan will be in their best interest. The Petersons would need to create a trust or will to ensure that their property goes to someone other than Alex. Without a will, the house will go to Alex.
Example Approach:
“Mom, Dad, I know that you’ve been hesitant about working with lawyers and that it’s not something you’re used to doing. I understand and respect this. You don’t want to end up with your estate ending up like Aunt Jenny, who planned to leave everything to the daughter of her cousin. She didn’t have any will and the court decided to give her entire estate to her younger sister against her wishes. We can begin by writing down all your wishes and putting together all the information and documents you will need. I brought along a
simple workbook
that we can use.”
I know estate planning professionals who are upfront with you throughout the entire process. Once we find someone you trust, they’ll sit down with you for an
initial consultation
. There’s no commitment–after they get an idea of your situation, the will simply go through all your options with. And of course, I’m happy to go with you if that would make you more comfortable.”
“If you’re willing, let’s take the first step right now. Let’s watch a free webinar and make some iced-tea together. We can then set up a no-obligation, complimentary consultation at the end. “Estate Planning Experts In ArizonaAs they say, experience is the best teacher. At Phelps LaClair, you’re in great hands. Our experience with estate planning, spanning two generations, has enabled us to have a keen eye for establishing our clients’ estates in a way that will be successful. We know what works and what doesn’t, and we treat people with the respect and care they deserve. You can learn more by visiting our education centre and, when you’re ready to get started,
give a call
for assistance.
Photo by Luca from
Unsplash on 8.14.2024 | used under the creative commons license
